Overcoming the “never enough” mindset: why you don’t need to do it all

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about my “never enough” mindset. You know the one - where no matter how much you’ve done in a day, you still feel like you could (or should) have done more.

It’s exhausting. And honestly, it’s a perfect recipe for burnout.

What the “never enough” mindset looks like

For me, it shows up in small ways - lying in bed, mentally running through everything I didn’t do that day, or starting the morning already feeling behind. Even when I’m working on one thing, I catch myself stressing about everything else I should be doing instead. It’s a constant state of “more, more, more,” and it ruins any sense of satisfaction or rest.

It’s the WORST!

Where does this belief come from?

Part of me knows where it started. Growing up, I often heard, “as long as you try your best,” which was meant kindly. But somewhere along the line, I internalised it as, “you must always be giving your absolute all.”

And honestly? That’s just not sustainable. Who can give 100% effort to every single thing, all the time?

Some things deserve to be half-arsed. You can only “full-arse” certain things in life!

Two mindset shifts that are helping me

Lately, I’ve been experimenting with two simple but powerful shifts to quieten that inner critic -

Naming the narrative

I started calling my “never enough” voice - Nuffy. Now, when I catch myself spiralling – “You should be working! You should be cleaning! You should be doing it all...RIGHT NOW!” – I can pause and say, “That’s just Nuffy talking.”

Naming it creates distance. It reminds me that this voice isn’t truth. It’s just one (unhelpful) narrative, and I get to choose a different one.

Choosing compassion over perfection

Instead of berating myself for not doing everything, I’ve been practising committing to one thing at a time.

If today I’m focusing on client work, I let go of the house jobs. If I take a morning to garden, I give myself permission to enjoy it rather than feel guilty for not sitting at my desk.

I’ve also started questioning old beliefs: Does this really need my best effort? Or would “good enough” – or even “half-arsed” – actually be fine?

Spoiler: more often than not, it’s the latter.

The result: less stress, more calm

It’s still a work in progress, but the more I practise this, the calmer I feel. My nervous system isn’t stuck in that constant fight-or-flight state, and I can approach my day with a clearer head.

If you recognise that “never enough” voice too, maybe try naming it. Maybe even ask yourself...

• Where did this belief come from?

• Do I still need it?

Because here’s the truth I’m learning - worth isn’t measured by output. Sometimes, “enough” is simply allowing yourself to be.

If this resonates with you and you’d like to hear me unpack it more, tune into my podcast episode here.